A Parent’s Past

I read a short story called, “The Fictive Fragment of a Father and Son” by, David Mura and it was about a son trying to find the truth about his father’s past. Some of the story confused me a little bit; however, toward the end of the story, he, the son, was wondering why his father was so angry and what triggered that. It reminded me of my mother, when I used to live at home. Growing up, you are not aware of that much going on; but, once you start getting older, you start to become aware of the things that make your parents tick. I didn’t become fully aware until I was about seventeen years old, when my parents started struggling financially. The same way the father in the story was arrested one morning and not sure of it and having all those tags on his family’s belongings and was not sure, changes a person. My mother was always devoted to family and its values; but, money could cause a huge amount of pain in the family circle. Which is why I will make sure I do not go through what my family did. I only remember of my mother’s past from her own voice and she was happier and didn’t have the stress of money like she once did. I love that the son wants to know the truth behind his father’s past and it is a shame that his father had to act American or always make sure he was. Everyone should be who they are because that’s what America is all about, many people with many different backgrounds. Trying to be someone you aren’t, will mess with your head and even trying to act like nothing is wrong, like my mother tried to do, does’t make things better either. I am happy that the father in the story had a son and I am grateful that my mother and father created me, because we both will make our parent’s story better for the future.

You Never Know How Far You Can Go

I read a short story by Jhumpa Lahiri called, “The Third and Final Continent” and I have to say, it was fascinating. He traveled all the way from India and lived in three different continents and survived without even knowing what to expect. His norms were different than the typical American way and he had to adjust how things are done here. This makes me think about the idea of America, where there is always a standard to do or say something and we do not think about other norms. For instance, my boyfriend is Chinese and sometimes I question why his family acts a certain way or eats a certain way and he always tells me that, that is the Chinese culture. It opens up my eyes because America is suppose to be proud and represent free expression; but, at the same time, people are judged for doing just that. This short story also made me realize how far I came in my life. For example, I moved twice when I was younger to different towns in New Jersey, then I lived in Edison most of my life. After high school, my family and I moved to a town called Iselin and two years later, I currently live in Avenel with my twin sister, Crystal. This man in the story, experienced his first death in America and I experienced many. He has a son and even though I do not have any children or am not married, he wants to remind his son that he has a brave father, who conquered so much and if he can accomplish that, his son can accomplish anything and that is the kind of message I want to pass down to my children one day. It also made him realized how much he experienced, by traveling here, sleeping in many different places in a short amount of time, and seeing the world from its past til now, makes me realize how far I’ve came. I have experienced many tragedies with family, friends, heartbreaks, school and so much more; however, it only makes you stronger and I love that his son has someone like that as a role model.

What is America to you?

I read three short poems: “Let America Be America Again” by, Langston Hughes, “Postcards to Columbus” by, Sherman Alexie and “Family Ties” by, Jimmy Santiago Baca. I came across a common theme in all three poems, where America was not the same as everyone’s history books claim. This brings me back to the connection of the TED talk about the dangers of a single story because these famous poets have a different perspective of America. What is funny to me, is that I feel as though I learned more about history now, that I am older, than I did through my K-12 education career. We all know the saying, “In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue” and yet I learned that he did not discover America. The Native Americans were the original landowners in a way and it is interesting to me that I get the idea that in “Postcards to Columbus,” Native Americans were describing their experiences in America and the original discoverer was no where to be found, and if the history textbooks just told the truth about Columbus, there would be no single story about him. I also connected with Langston Hughes because he describes that America is suppose to be the land of the free and home of the brave and not everyone is or feels that way. Even in “Family Ties,” a family was surrounded by their family members, amazing food and a great home; but, in the back of their head, they knew they couldn’t afford a place like that. How is anyone suppose to strive for what they want in life if they are always being kicked to the curb, shamed on, and not listened to? That is why there is always dangers in a single story. Hughes was never treated like he had the freedom to live his life, the Native Americans were perceived as the enemy and a poor family might just need to be finally heard. I agree that America is beautiful because of all the different people that live here and everyone may have the same opportunities and choices to make for their life; however, it is never that easy. People come here because when they hear the word “America,” they hear freedom, courage and bravery and yet, there is so much more that goes into it than just that and again, people shouldn’t just listen to a single story. Life in America is filled with many choices; but, nothing is ever handed to anyone, of any color, and it is ashamed that back then it wasn’t like this. However, it should open up people’s eyes that they should be grateful for living in times of today and not in the thirties.

“I Would Remember”

I read “I Would Remember” by, Carlos Bulosan and I have to say it was shocking. He experienced multiple encounters with death and it actually brought me back to a memory that happened not so long ago. It was around July of 2019, my grandfather passed away on my father’s side of the family, then in August of 2019, my grandmother passed away on my mother’s side of the family and finally, hopefully there isn’t anymore soon, my amazingly beautiful mother passed away in October of 2019. It was like I wanted to go out with a bang of this ending decade; but, this is not what I had in mind. Reading this story reminded me of this devastating feeling and still feeling that Carlos went through. Having someone there all the time, helping you throughout your life and all of sudden their gone, is heartbreaking. However, something I noticed of Carlos was that, he kept moving forward no matter what by taking what he learned from each death encounter and holding that memory with him to cherish and never gave up. This brings me to the question, What is America or the idea of it? Carlos coming to America and continuing to experience these death encounters shows that America is not perfect and not all that different in some ways. People are cruel everywhere you go and not everyone is happy with immigrants coming to the United States. This story opens up a lot of secrets that America keeps hidden due to having this idea of expressing yourself and being free and yet, you can be attacked and unfortunately killed for trying to do just that. This story challenges the understanding of America because in America, you can have the freedom to be anything and that is why people from different areas want to come here, for a better life. However, even in America, there are difficulties, unbelievable encounters with death, constant questioning and this idea that you can accomplish anything you want because it is just that “easy.” I might have experienced some natural deaths in my life and I am extremely proud and fortunate to be born and living in America; but, reading stories like this, just makes me want to help more people because no one should be experiencing such brutal deaths like the ones mentioned in the story. It truly opens up your eyes and makes you have a different perspective of how lucky people in America are due to not experiencing events like this and it makes me wonder why we don’t try to just help more people instead of always having an assumption that immigrants are bad and dangerous people.

“The Dangers of the Single Story”

I have watched a TED talk on Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s powerful voice discussing about the dangers of a single story. She explains that a lot of people have a misunderstanding about someone from a different country or even a person you heard about because you only listen to one side or perspective of “their” story. The truth is, anything you hear about someone or something is not the whole story or their truth because you did not hear it from them. Watching this video opened my eyes that many people do have a cultural bias towards others and do not care to learn about their experiences. Once you fully grasp the whole story, it will allow you to have empathy on someone and to push those bias thoughts to the side. This is why many stories matter. I am going to give you an example of something from my life: some of my family members believe that I have a lot of money because I live on my own with my twin sister, Crystal and I work as much as I can and of course attend school full time. Since I live on my own, that shows a sense of success and it is; however, some of them consistently ask for money often or think we can afford a bunch of things because we are “hot shit” to them, excuse my language. The truth to this story is, we only have enough for bills and pray we have enough to food shop. We cry on our own time because financial struggle is such a reality; but no one will ever see through that because we always have a smile on our faces. Yes, I am a white girl with blonde hair and blue eyes and people probably look at me and think I am rich and have no worries in this world, when it is the complete opposite. I have many stories about my life and so does Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. We are two different individuals; but, both of our stories shows power and authenticity because the experiences and difficulties we went through, shows our true strength and understanding of ourselves, which is why many stories matter. It helps give you a better idea of who someone is and knowing many stories about someone, can help you relate to someone else as well. Therefore, the dangers of a single story will cause judgement and bias toward someone due to not really knowing the whole truth, so get to know someone every day, learn their stories and do not be afraid to share the many amazing stories of your life too.

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